Sunday, July 26, 2009
We have a budding photographer.
Our oldest is becoming quite the young lady. I enjoy the way her mind works, her conversation, and even her questions, even though on occasion I tell her I need 20 minutes without them. She has been wanting to take pictures, so I let her go to it one day. Most of the pictures on this post, she took. The others I tossed in just for fun, and to demonstrate what these little ones have been "up to" (quite literally sometimes). 
Monday, July 20, 2009
"What Binds Us, Frees Us"
I generally try to keep the focus of the blog on sharing the joy of our home with others out of gratitude for the gift that God has given us through the life of our family (albeit imperfect) by following the example of St. Francis ("Preach the Gospel and if necessary use words"). However, every now and then I feel moved to write in more detail, not because I think or feel like I have all of the answers and not because I even think I'm living out my faith in the way I know I should, in the way that I want to live it out. But because through the Holy Spirit, I am given the faith to accept the Church teachings and practice that faith.
In a recent discussion I expressed my openness to having more children (not necessarily immediately, but I am nonetheless open to having more). I am aware that this way of life is counter-cultural, and that became even more evident by the response I received in this conversation. While I was not necessarily offended by the response, this is a matter that is very dear to my heart and one that is so often misunderstood. I do not wish to defend myself. Rather, I wish to defend Jesus Christ and what He teaches through the Church about the gift of our sexuality and the gift of life. While I do not know that my little blog post will be useful to Our Lord in changing anyone's mind or heart on the matter, or that anyone who does not share my belief will read it, I still ardently desire to defend His teaching. I wish to do so as humbly as I can. And please keep in mind that I do not wish to impose my beliefs on anyone...my purpose is, again, simply to defend what I believe to be true, and if I believe it to be true, well then, it deserves sharing. So here goes nothing!
My husband and I have been married for five years, and we have three children ages 4, 2, and 1. Some find it shocking and even somewhat irresponsible that we do not use contraception. We do, however, use natural family planning which involves learning the woman's natural sign posts to determine days of fertility and abstaining on those days (if trying to postpone pregnancy). Contrary to popular belief, natural family planning is not an oppressive, impossible, or imposing way of life, and it is definitely not irresponsible. Indeed, it can be very challenging and even somewhat grueling. I'll be honest and admit that we have experienced times of great frustration in using natural family planning. But, we have at the same time found that it is totally and completely worth the effort! And we have also found that while it feels binding, the reality is that, above all, it is incredibly freeing!
We embrace the Church's teaching about the two purposes of the conjugal act 1.) The unity of spouses through the unselfish and total gift of self. (If one or both spouses withhold fertility, it is not a total gift of self, since one aspect of the self is not given). 2.) The procreation of children. Here I'll refer to the Catechism of the Catholic Church (paragraph 2366)...It is put so beautifully: "Fecundity is a gift, an end of marriage, for conjugal love naturally tends to be fruitful. A child does not come from outside as something added on to the mutual love of the spouses, but springs from the very heart of that mutual giving, as its fruit and fulfillment. So the Church, which is 'on the side of life,' teaches that 'it is necessary that EACH AND EVERY MARRIAGE ACT remain ordered per se to the procreation of human life.' 'This particular doctrine...is based on the inseparable connection...between the unitive and the procreative significance which are both inherent to the marriage act.'
On to my somewhat philosophical support of this teaching. Because of our status as "creatures", the fact of the matter is that there will always be something that, in a sense, binds us. Some try to deny this, and those of us who are Christian can certainly struggle with pride (I know I have) and rebel against the truth of our complete reliance on God. But, there is no getting away from it. We cannot hold ourselves in existence. We did not even choose to exist, and some day we will die. These are truths that bind us-we cannot escape them. There are also laws of nature and science that bind us. We have to eat and sleep to survive. We have vital organs that we cannot live without. When we jump, we always come down. It follows, then, that on the spiritual level, just as on the natural level, the truth binds us. The great irony, however, is that only when we are bound to the truth do we experience freedom in its most real sense. Think about it for just a minute. Without the laws of nature our world would be total chaos-even man makes laws to prevent chaos. Where would we be without traffic laws? We need order to be truly free. If this is true in the natural realm, even more so in the spiritual. That's what God's laws are about. They are about real freedom, not about a list of rules. Spiritually, we face the choice of what will bind us. Will we be bound to the Truth, which in turn will set us free? Or will we be bound to sin and disorder and thus be held captive by them?
This brings me back to the twofold purpose of the marital act. It is Truth. When one of those aspects of the act is missing, we do not experience our sexuality as God intended it. He is, after all, the Creator of this very beautiful act, and since He created it, He certainly has intentions as to how we are to experience it. He knows that when one of these aspects is missing, we do not experience the absolute beauty and power that He intended. The fruit of the act will not be as He truly intended it-this is the case even when it involves the unity of the spouses. Why have a little sliver of the pie when you can have a five course meal-with the whole piece of pie to top it off? He wants us to have it ALL. He wants us to have the deep and powerful pleasure involved in the marital act even MORE than we want it! The truth about sex is binding, but it is meant to set us free to be open to the awesome beauty and treasure hidden in the proper experience of it!
Thanks for reading!! I am grateful for the opportunity to defend my faith-even if it's only on cyberspace. I wish I would have had the time to convey this in the discussion (mentioned above) from the other day. My heart is burning with desire to spread Truth wherever I go. I cannot imagine life without it. May the Lord bless us and make us ever ready to embrace Him and His Truth at every moment, that we may be really and truly free!
In a recent discussion I expressed my openness to having more children (not necessarily immediately, but I am nonetheless open to having more). I am aware that this way of life is counter-cultural, and that became even more evident by the response I received in this conversation. While I was not necessarily offended by the response, this is a matter that is very dear to my heart and one that is so often misunderstood. I do not wish to defend myself. Rather, I wish to defend Jesus Christ and what He teaches through the Church about the gift of our sexuality and the gift of life. While I do not know that my little blog post will be useful to Our Lord in changing anyone's mind or heart on the matter, or that anyone who does not share my belief will read it, I still ardently desire to defend His teaching. I wish to do so as humbly as I can. And please keep in mind that I do not wish to impose my beliefs on anyone...my purpose is, again, simply to defend what I believe to be true, and if I believe it to be true, well then, it deserves sharing. So here goes nothing!
My husband and I have been married for five years, and we have three children ages 4, 2, and 1. Some find it shocking and even somewhat irresponsible that we do not use contraception. We do, however, use natural family planning which involves learning the woman's natural sign posts to determine days of fertility and abstaining on those days (if trying to postpone pregnancy). Contrary to popular belief, natural family planning is not an oppressive, impossible, or imposing way of life, and it is definitely not irresponsible. Indeed, it can be very challenging and even somewhat grueling. I'll be honest and admit that we have experienced times of great frustration in using natural family planning. But, we have at the same time found that it is totally and completely worth the effort! And we have also found that while it feels binding, the reality is that, above all, it is incredibly freeing!
We embrace the Church's teaching about the two purposes of the conjugal act 1.) The unity of spouses through the unselfish and total gift of self. (If one or both spouses withhold fertility, it is not a total gift of self, since one aspect of the self is not given). 2.) The procreation of children. Here I'll refer to the Catechism of the Catholic Church (paragraph 2366)...It is put so beautifully: "Fecundity is a gift, an end of marriage, for conjugal love naturally tends to be fruitful. A child does not come from outside as something added on to the mutual love of the spouses, but springs from the very heart of that mutual giving, as its fruit and fulfillment. So the Church, which is 'on the side of life,' teaches that 'it is necessary that EACH AND EVERY MARRIAGE ACT remain ordered per se to the procreation of human life.' 'This particular doctrine...is based on the inseparable connection...between the unitive and the procreative significance which are both inherent to the marriage act.'
On to my somewhat philosophical support of this teaching. Because of our status as "creatures", the fact of the matter is that there will always be something that, in a sense, binds us. Some try to deny this, and those of us who are Christian can certainly struggle with pride (I know I have) and rebel against the truth of our complete reliance on God. But, there is no getting away from it. We cannot hold ourselves in existence. We did not even choose to exist, and some day we will die. These are truths that bind us-we cannot escape them. There are also laws of nature and science that bind us. We have to eat and sleep to survive. We have vital organs that we cannot live without. When we jump, we always come down. It follows, then, that on the spiritual level, just as on the natural level, the truth binds us. The great irony, however, is that only when we are bound to the truth do we experience freedom in its most real sense. Think about it for just a minute. Without the laws of nature our world would be total chaos-even man makes laws to prevent chaos. Where would we be without traffic laws? We need order to be truly free. If this is true in the natural realm, even more so in the spiritual. That's what God's laws are about. They are about real freedom, not about a list of rules. Spiritually, we face the choice of what will bind us. Will we be bound to the Truth, which in turn will set us free? Or will we be bound to sin and disorder and thus be held captive by them?
This brings me back to the twofold purpose of the marital act. It is Truth. When one of those aspects of the act is missing, we do not experience our sexuality as God intended it. He is, after all, the Creator of this very beautiful act, and since He created it, He certainly has intentions as to how we are to experience it. He knows that when one of these aspects is missing, we do not experience the absolute beauty and power that He intended. The fruit of the act will not be as He truly intended it-this is the case even when it involves the unity of the spouses. Why have a little sliver of the pie when you can have a five course meal-with the whole piece of pie to top it off? He wants us to have it ALL. He wants us to have the deep and powerful pleasure involved in the marital act even MORE than we want it! The truth about sex is binding, but it is meant to set us free to be open to the awesome beauty and treasure hidden in the proper experience of it!
Thanks for reading!! I am grateful for the opportunity to defend my faith-even if it's only on cyberspace. I wish I would have had the time to convey this in the discussion (mentioned above) from the other day. My heart is burning with desire to spread Truth wherever I go. I cannot imagine life without it. May the Lord bless us and make us ever ready to embrace Him and His Truth at every moment, that we may be really and truly free!
Friday, July 17, 2009
Wouldn't want to leave Little Angel #2 out...
Handsome, cute, and so much fun...even with his terrible case of the "Terrible Twos"!
I Love being a terror!
Little Angel #3 is bursting with personality. She is also starting to get in to almost everything! I couldn't get over her look of pride and self satisfaction as she pulled my books down and started spreading them all over the living room. (She chose my "Women of Grace" books-I guess she is already getting started at being a "woman of grace"!)
Flower Girl
Those of you on Facebook have probably already seen some of the flower girl pictures. Little Angel #1 was blessed with the opportunity to be a flower girl at the end of June. This experience was enough to convince me that four years old is just about the perfect age to be a flower girl. Her sense of wander and excitement were priceless.
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