The Call to Surrender

As I face the struggle mentioned in a previous post, many sinful and weak tendencies are being brought into light. It is time for the pruning of branches in my heart. It is somewhat painful, and in the past I've often felt"punished" by God during these times. As I continue along my faith journey, however, I am much more aware that pruning and purification are gifts given by God in His generosity, and that He is as gentle with us as He can be. How merciful the Lord is! I believe now more than ever that God's mercy is His greatest attribute, because I have experienced His mercy so abundantly in my life. I now have confidence in His mercy. In large part, this is due to the life, example, and intercession of St. Therese the Little Flower. I highly recommend reading "I Believe in Love" which is based on her teaching.

Though it is not easy, this pruning requires my total surrender to God. I'm grateful for all the ways it is helping to pray so constantly. It must be about 600 times a day that I start to get anxious and worked up and I have to re-give Him the situation. I have to re-give to Him my desire to be understood, my desire to be esteemed, my desire to be right, my desire to know that I am right, my desire to be without fault, my desire to fix the situation, and so on. Surrendering means that I have to let go of my pride and all of the ways it is manifested in my life. It means that I must come before the Lord with unveiled face. Looking back at my years at Franciscan University, I can remember so many, many precious moments of being in the Eucharistic Presence of Christ just letting go and letting Him bring to light all of the darkness in my heart and laying it all at His feet! How beautiful! And I hear Him calling me back to that! Heaven on earth, total surrender to the most Merciful Heart of Jesus in the Blessed Sacrament! "O let me love Thee more and more!"